My Date with Maud the Werecat
by monkeybait
Summary: The sequel to The Eragon Dating Game! Eragon is on a date with the winner of the show. Unknowingly, however, someone is plotting their revenge! Romance was just for fun.
1. Preparation for the Date

Well, here is my awesome sequel! For a brief synopsis, Eragon gets ready for his date and finds a big surprise about Maud! After we finally found some money and a restaurant Saphira will fit in, someone plots his revenge against Eragon! Who is it and what will this scheming being come up with?

* * *

Eragon has come out of the bathroom and he is squeaky clean! Eragon sees a tuxedo I left him on his bed and a message.

_Dear Eragon,_

_If you try to leave, we will find you! I have a tracking device in your foot, too! So tough beans mister! Mwa, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!_

_I also left you a tux for you to wear on your big date. Tootle-oo!_

_-monkeybait_

Eragon blinked.

_I do not understand how she can't be evil, _Eragon thought to Saphira angrily. _Not only does she make me date an idiot werecat, but she makes me wear this stupid thing!_

_Well, I guess it's what people in this time period wear when they go on dates._

_Yeah, but a bow? Is that for men now? Because it's usually for women!_

_A fad is a fad._

Eragon unhappily places it in his hair. _I feel silly._

_You look silly._

_Gee, thanks Saphira._

_Hey, I call 'em when I see 'em._

Eragon walks out of the room. Sol and I can't help it. We laugh our heads off at his bizarre appearance.

"What?" Eragon asked, quite confused.

"Dude, what did you do with your bow tie?" Sol managed to say between breaths.

Eragon blinked again. "Is this not how you're supposed to wear it?"

"Ha, ha, ha- no!- ha, ha, ha!" I laughed. "You wear it, ha, ha, around your neck stupid!"

_Bow… so… feminine! _Eragon growled in his mind. He ripped it off. "It works better without it!"

"No, put it on again!" I shouted sadly. "You look hawt… like totally!"

"No! I refuse!" Eragon turned around. "If you keep laughing at me, I'm leaving! I don't care if whatever you say is true!"

Sol and I looked at each other.

"That's right! We'll find you!" I said. "As soon as this whole ordeal is over, we'll let you go back. So please? Just one more night of this and we'll leave you alone?" Sol and I gave him big Bambi eyes.

"Uh…" Eragon shrugged. "I guess I could do it for one more night… better than death…"

_I'll never let you live this down._

_It's your own fault!_

_Oh yeah, I forgot… I'm so awesome! _Saphira grinned. Eragon sulkily walked away, dreading his dragon had betrayed him.

* * *

"How you doing, Maud?" I asked the werecat.

"Pretty good." She grinned. "I can't believe we tricked Eragon and Saphira into believing I'm a total moron! Won't he be surprised!"

"Yes, yes!" I said. "And what luck that you won, too…" Maud grinned.

"Anyway," I continued, "we'll break the news to him as soon as we get to the restaurant… I think he might actually be happier, but I'm sure there's a lot of bidders on e-bay who would pay big money for a photo of him totally freaked out."

All seemed to be running smoothly. Saphira and Eragon still didn't know, not to mention Eragon's life was all muddled up. I got to see Eragon with a bow on his head. And Maud actually had a brain (?). Gosh, who knew? But there was one thing I actually hadn't thought about… nor even knew about, for that matter.

Someone already had a crush on Maud. And not only that, but they were currently plotting their revengeful scheme of revenge!

* * *

Well, good first chapter? Send a review and say so, because I gotta know! XD 


	2. The Arch Foe

Yeah, chapter two, everyone loves chapter two!

Meanwhile, Angela was back at her humble house mixing toxins and highly poisonous chemicals that could burn off your flesh like she usually did. It was quite an interesting hobby. Plus it smelled like old toothpaste.

Angela busied herself with her hobby, while a certain someone that just so happened to stay with her paced back and forth in his bedroom.

"That fiendish fiend Eragon!" the creature said. "Thinking he can steal my beloved Maud…" He purred unhappily as he took out a picture of her and stared adoringly at it. "If only I could think of a way to thwart him in his evil tracks! He would not see it coming and then I could laugh to the sky about his naivety!" He laughed at the sky. "And now that I've got the laugh down, I should probably think of a way to get my revenge…" he said to himself. "Me! Solembum! Yes, that's right! The unexpected werecat! Me! Ha, ha, ha!"

"Who are you talking to?" Angela shouted from downstairs.

"No one." Solembum walked to where she was. "You wouldn't happen to have a few potions that would make someone fall asleep and forget who they are?"

Angela blinked suspiciously. "Why do you ask?"  
"No reason…" Solembum whistled, then pointed out the window. "OMG, a highly flammable toxin is walking across the street!"

"WAIT! HOLD ON!" Angela grabbed a jar and a net and ran outside.

"What a moron." Solembum grabbed a few random ingredients. "That should last her a few good hours or so. And besides, making a potion can't be too hard." He threw the ingredients together and stirred. "… yuck. Smells like freeze-dried squid. Well, this can't be anything good… hey, why's it bubbling? Is there a flame underneath it? No, there's not… what's up with-?"

KA-BOOOOOOOOOOM!

"SOLEMBUM!" Solembum could hear Angela shouting from miles away. If indeed she was miles away and not right outside the house.

"Oh, no… oh, no…" Solembum thought. He quickly began sweeping, but Angela was there in seconds flat.

"SOLEMBUM, WHAT WAS THAT EXPLOSION ALL ABOUT? 'FESS UP!" Angela yelled as loud as she could.

"Explosion? I didn't hear any explosion," Solembum said innocently. "I was just sweeping up these ashes like a good werecat should."

"Yeah. Uh-huh. And where did these ashes come from in the first place?" Angela questioned, putting her hands on her hips.

"Um…" Solembum sighed. "Internet?"

"Try again."

"My dust collection exploded?"

"Three strikes and you're out, mister man."

"Okay, fine, maybe I did mix some ingredients!" Solembum said. "Happy?"

"Why?" Angela questioned.

"Revenge."

"On who? You don't have any enemies."

"Uh… sure I do…" Solembum said, trying to contemplate a new enemy on the spot. "His name is, uh… Don…"

"Uh-huh," said Angela, not really looking very believing.

"Yeah and he, uh… stole something from me… or something…" Solembum shrugged. "So, do you think you can whip up a potion like what I asked for?"

"Oh sure, but it'll charge you."

"WHAT? But we're friends!" the werecat shouted.

"True as that is, I can tell you're lying right now," Angela stated flatly.

"Oh." Maud frowned. "I still have an enemy though. I just don't want to tell you who it is. So there."

"Fine, whatever," said Angela. Then she suddenly hugged his furry head. "Awww, that is so CUTE! You have enemies!"

"If you don't let go of me, my claws are going to make it so you're as happy as I feel right now."

"Sorry." So Angela used her common sense and let go, and then started on a potion.

"Just you wait Eragon," Solembum said. "I will take back Maud from you! Me! Mwa, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

_I wonder who he's talking to_, Angela asked herself.

Sorry! I know that took a long time. But I do have a very good reason! I'm sorry that I forgot to tell you, but from Thursday night to Monday night, I was in Washington D.C. with my school! It was pretty fun, even though a lot of people got food poisoning. Anyway, I don't know if I'll be able to write anything tonight, so I'm writing this in the morning!

So many people have reviewed! I'd just like to thank you all!


	3. Eragon Tries to Devise a Plan

Yay, chapter three! My chapters might get a little more delayed. Lot's of homework. Yecch!

* * *

Eragon sat in the now empty restaurant (no, it was empty when he got there, silly!) with Saphira. Eragon decided not to speak in his head because no one was around (or were they…?). 

"Maybe that girl is lying about what she put in my foot. Then we could leave. Like, right now."

_Or maybe she's not. It's not worth the risk._

"I think she just made up the number googolplex."

_Or if she didn't you're going to die._

"Saphira, you're not helping."

_Yeah, well you're in love with an elf princess._

Eragon blinked. "And that has to do with what we're talking about how…?"

_It's a good comeback, is it not?_

"It's not."

_You're just jealous._

"Jealous? What do I have to be JEALOUS about? That you can fly? That you're taller than me? That you have big pointy teeth?"

_Not only that, but I have a comeback and you don't. So there. _Saphira stuck out her tongue at him. Eragon growled.

"Holy cheese, Saphira."

_Was that a comeback?_

"NO!" Eragon yelled.

"No what?" I asked, coming in the doorway with Soledad, Bub, Earl, and Maud.

"I wasn't talking to you," Eragon said. "But never mind. Let's just get this stupid thing over with."

Someone they hadn't seen was hanging from the ceiling dressed in all black and looking much like a ninja.

"Yes, Eragon," the suspicious ninja who we probably all know said. "Fight with your silly dragon now… for it might be the only fight you have with her again! Because I will prevail! Me! Solembum! Mwa, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

"Do you guys hear anything?" Eragon asked, looking around.

"No," I said. Bub and Earl nodded in agreement, but figured they'd heard voices in their heads. Maud started scratching the walls, pretending to be mad that we pretended to declaw her.

Eragon looked around, but he could still not see the ninja-tastic Solembum.

"Okay, well we'll leave you alone… except for these camera men!" I said. Seventeen camera men walked in. Each of them had three cameras, ten workers, and a doughnut boy.

"Excuse me?" Eragon said blinking. "Why do you need seventeen cameras?"

"You wouldn't understand, it is SO complicated," I said, merely because I didn't know either. "Just pretend like they aren't here."

"HOW!"

"USE YOUR IMAGINATION! IF YOU WERE BORN WITH ONE!" I yelled back and closed my eyes. "See? They're all gone. No one here but me, myself, and that pretty unicorn…" I began stroking a table and telling it how pretty its mane was.

* * *

Argh. I'm sorry. I need to post this now. The chapters might be coming less and less. First Washington. Right after that, the teachers just threw homework in our faces. Especially my Social Studies teacher. I like her, but there was just so much work! And then on the weekend, I got sick. Not bad sick, like throwing up sick. Sick like you don't feel like doing anything but sitting in front of the TV with your mouth open because you don't have the energy to hold it close and your eyes slits, lids raised just enough to watch cartoons. That kind of sick. 

So sorry! I will try harder. I decided to use bananasrokk's idea. :D


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